The sugar cookie pool has kicked into high gear at the North Pole as elves still working in every department are now placing bets – almost all exclusively in Santa’s favor. “It isn’t a bet on whether Santa will make it or not,” explained Elf Hank Beedle, director of this year’s Christmas Party at the […]
Never, ever doubt what Santa can do, kids. With Jingle Bell 1 now in the air Santa has TWO workshops and TWO wrapping departments hard at work. Things are NOT behind — they’re ahead! If I had just one thing to say to sum this thing up it would be this: Santa has taken control […]
Breaking News! With a series of massive explosions the North Pole blew off the roof of the large top-secret building and launched a sleigh craft carrier — a huge floating airship. WOW. It is big, big news — every bit as historic as Santa said it would be. That Big Building with No Name is […]
The media speculation continues to run rampant and Santa is taking a lot of criticism. The odds makers and analysts are predicting Santa may not make it this year. I haven’t spoken to Santa for a few hours now. But if any of that were true he would be talking to me first. And he […]
Mrs. Claus is at home preparing for the traditional North Pole Christmas Eve party. She is the hostess of the party every year. But this year things are a little different. The party it appears will be starting a little later than usual. That partly has to do with how late the workshop is working […]
If something is to happen in the next hour Santa’s reindeer might not be aware of it. It is nap time for them. In speaking with Elf Victor he assures us that all the reindeer are healthy and ready to go. But with hours still until Santa’s launch he doesn’t want to disturb their rest. […]
The world is burning up the phone lines, emails and fax machines to the North Pole as media contacts and government representatives debate Santa’s “historic” news. We still don’t know the nature of what Santa has in mind but some seem to think it is bad news. One media outlet is blaring headlines on its […]
Here’s an interesting development. Elves working on Santa’s flight path over the Pacific have been put on high alert. That means they are at their stations, watching radar, receiving confidential tracking data, and prepared to report any activity in the skies there. The Tracking Department confirms that elves in Alaska, Hawaii, Midway, Guam, the Philippines, […]
While we are now only 90 minutes away from whatever this big historic event is we remind you that it is NOT too late to enter your ideas for the naming of Santa’s sleigh this year. Santa names the sleigh just before he takes off and the Tracking Department assures me that Santa is still […]
Elf Billy from the Weather Department has issued an urgent bulletin warning the North Pole of bad weather. A blizzard with white out conditions is expected to hit any time now. That’s kind of normal for Christmas at the North Pole. The weather doesn’t affect Santa and the reindeer much because when they take off […]
“You will be blown away,” Elf Agent X just told me by telephone. He was talking about the big historic event scheduled for two hours from now. It has certainly turned the North Pole on its head. I’ve never seen more elves so confused and worried as I am right now. I have noticed however […]
When work stops on Mrs. Claus’ cookies you know something important is up. Her kitchen is vacant at this hour as all elves there have left to gather a couple of miles away at an enclosed grandstand. That remote grandstand has everyone talking. The fact that is was built and nobody here noticed it is […]
