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Santa Chats with Elves and Believers

Santa Chats

Santa was our guest of honor in North Pole Chat on Sunday, November 27th, 2022. Here is a transcript of that event:

Elf Ernest Hi Santa!!
Elf Ernest Thank you for being here tonight. I know you’re really busy.
Santa Claus It’s a pleasure. I’m trying to get to as many people as I can this year. The last few years have been kind of tough. I like doing it this way in chat!
Elf Ernest Santa, I’m going to ask you a few questions that have been submitted to us by our readers here on Santa Update
Elf Ernest Then we will open up the chat for discussion.
Santa Claus Ok, that sounds like a good plan. Fire away.
Elf Ernest Santa, we are getting a lot of questions about retirement for you. I think there are some movies that cause these questions to come in. Are you thinking of retirement?
Santa Claus Heavens no. Never. I’m not the retiring type.
Elf Ernest Santa, this causes a lot of questions with people. How long have you been Santa?
Santa Claus Well, I’ve been myself for as long as I can remember. But Santa is more than just my name. It’s my job, too. A title. A real honor among men.
Elf Ernest I think that’s the reason people have so many questions about this. They want to know how you became Santa.
Santa Claus That is a very long story, Ernest. It took me many years. And if someone else does this it will take them many years too.
Elf Ernest That’s just it. They want to know if you will be retiring from this someday.
Santa Claus It is not in my plan, Ernest. I want to be Santa as long as I am able to do the job.
Elf Ernest If you can’t do the job, is it like in the movies where some guy is just randomly selected out in the world to become Santa?
Santa Claus No, that’s silly. That would never happen.
Elf Ernest Can you tell us how it works then?
Santa Claus No, I’m not at liberty to share that. Let’s just say that IF there is someone else besides ME who becomes Santa the world will never know that happened. It would take years to happen. And the way it works is actually very, very complex. It certainly is not random as those silly movies make it out to be.
Elf Ernest Ok, Santa. Next question: how do elves get to do more important jobs than the ones they have now. As you know, we have many, many people wanting to not only be elves but to be important elves. To live and work at the North Pole.
Santa Claus That’s a good question and I appreciate it.
Santa Claus Real elves work as elves no matter where they are. Did you know we have MORE elves away from the North Pole than living at the North Pole?
Elf Ernest No, I wasn’t aware of that.
Santa Claus Elf work is worldwide. And elf work is very diverse. So, young elves – and I’m not talking about age here, I mean elves that are new at being an elf – they seem to think working and living at the North Pole is the best there is in being an elf.
Santa Claus But when you talk to real elves who have broad experience and have done this for a while, it’s a different story. Real elves don’t really care where they work because their heart is with others. And others are out in the world.
Elf Ernest Ok, Santa….are you ready to take on this crowd here tonight?
Santa Claus Yes, Ernest. Great questions by the way.
Elf Ernest Ok, thanks Santa.
Elf Ernest Ok everyone. I’m about to take you off mute. I will take the first question from Elf Crusader. Nobody else ask anything, so we can keep order here. After Elf Crusader, I will then ask someone else to ask a question.
Elf Ulan I do!
Elf Ernest Ok, Elf Crusader, ask your question.
Elf Ernest Elf Crusader, are you there?
Elf Crusader Thank you ernest. Hello santa, I just wanted to ask you on what I can do to get my roommates to stop heckling me about being an elf
Elf Crusader Yes. Sorry. I was typing my response
Santa Claus Hi Elf Crusader. I’m surprised your roommates are doing that to you.
Santa Claus That’s really too bad. Maybe I should skip by them this year?
Elf Crusader Really? Why?
Santa Claus Just kidding. I couldn’t do that.
Santa Claus The best thing you can do is to just ignore them.
Elf Crusader I hope not sir. They loved their gifts last year
Santa Claus You have a level of knowledge now about being an elf and the elf world and Operation Merry Christmas that would take them years to acquire.
Elf Crusader I’ll do that. It is hard sometimes but I will do as you ask sir
Santa Claus They won’t understand at this point.
Santa Claus Best thing you can do is to wish them a Merry Christmas and wait for them to come to you for questions. And someday they will
Elf Ernest Elf Ulan, you can ask your question
Elf Crusader Absolutely not. Santa, I wanted to propose a new department at the pole
Santa Claus Hang in there, Elf Crusader. you’re doing good work!
Elf Ulan Thank you. Santa, I’m glad to hear that. My question is what is the most mass production or the funniest production in the workshop?
Elf Crusader Thank you sir
Santa Claus We actually have a department, it’s called Reindeer Operations. But I think you want your own separate department?
Elf Crusader Yes sir.  The north pole zoological and naturalist department.
Weathertrackingelf I also have a question
Santa Claus That’s a curious idea. I think after Christmas you and I should explore it, Elf Crusader. I would need a written proposal of what such a department would do and how it will be run.
Elf Crusader But , I want to let someone else asks their questions
Santa Claus Good golly, Elf Ulan. That’s a big question!
Elf Crusader No problem sir. I’ll get on it
Elf Ulan Thank you!
Santa Claus Honestly, I love visiting the line where we make Silly Putty. It’s actually a really tough product to make. But it’s like a party every time I go there.
Elf Ernest Elf WeatherTracking, please ask your question
Elf Ernest Elf Dash, please get ready…you’re next
Weathertrackingelf I was wondering what is your favorite cookie ands well as your favorite candy?
Elf Ernest Santa, why is the Silly Putty line like a party?
Elf Ulan Yeah, I think so too
Elf Ulan Sorry I was wrong
Santa Claus Silly Putty has a million uses. Every time I go there I ask the elves, “What happens if someone does THIS with Silly Putty”? And the answer is always “I don’t KNOW!” Last time, I asked what happens if you mix Silly Putty with Gak. And it turned into a real mess.
Elf Crusader I was just about to ask that myself Ernest. My guess is because it probably gets mesdy
Elf Crusader *messy*
Elf Ulan Santa, I think so too is hard work
Santa Claus No matter what we do with Silly Putty, even if it doesn’t work out, makes us laugh. I love visiting those elves!
Elf Crusader Yuck! Bet it was slimey like snot
Santa Claus WeatherTrackingElf – the cookie question is really hard for me to answer
Santa Claus I love so many of them.
Santa Claus It is hard to say which is my favorite.
Elf Crusader What about Oreos?
Santa Claus I do like a good chocolate chip macadamia
Weathertrackingelf I make cookies and Candy around Christmas
Santa Claus But I like a chocolate fudge mint cookie too
Elf Crusader Yummy
Santa Claus Sugar cookies, especially those by my dear wife, are also a staple.
Elf Crusader Oh man, you’re making me hungry sir
Barry Santa, how big is your naughty and nice list?
Elf Crusader He doesn’t have a naughty list
Santa Claus Now, as far as candy goes…well, that’s a mood thing. Believe it or not, I don’t often eat candy. I have to be in the mood for it. But like cookies, it is hard for me to say which is my favorite.
Elf Ernest Elf Dash, do you have a question?
Santa Claus Hi Barry. Crusader is right. There is no such thing as a naughty list.
Barry Ok, thanks for letting me know!
Elf Ernest Elf Jolly, your question will be next
Elf Jolly Ok
Elf Ernest and then Elf Candy Cane
Elf Crusader You’re welcome
Elf Dash Santa, which country is your favorite to visit?
Santa Claus Hi Elf Dash. I love visiting everywhere. I know that’s a cop out of an answer. But the world has SO many interesting places.
Elf Jolly Santa, how do you get to make branded toys without getting in trouble?
Elf Jolly Oops
Elf Ulan (Thank you Santa, but I’m afraid I can’t imagine what it is… ><)
Elf Crusader I asked crash that question once, he said he doesn’t particularly have a favorite but that they all look pretty at night( am I right Crash?)
Santa Claus I don’t actually make branded toys, Elf Jolly. But I buy a ton of them!
Elf Ernest What an awesome question, Elf Jolly!
Elf Jolly I didn’t know that! Thank you
Elf Ernest Elf Candy Cane, do you have a question for Santa?
Elf Florentina C That must get expensive.
Elf Ernest NotJack if you are still here, your question is next
Santa Claus We get very liberal volume discounts, Elf Florentina C.
Elf Candy Cane Santa what happens if we see you in our house at night?
Elf Ernest Jill, do you have a question for Santa?
NotJack What major historical events have you witnessed? What was it like? Did any stand out?
Santa Claus Hi Elf Candy Cane. If you see me, you see me. I get caught a few times each year. I’ll say hello but usually I am in such a hurry that I don’t get caught
Santa Claus Please don’t wait up for me!
Jill I do but I’ll wait a moment
Santa Claus NotJack, wow, that’s a question out of the blue. I’ve seen a LOT of history. The pandemic is a good example of recent history. But I suppose you’re asking about way back history, right?
NotJack Yes sir
Elf Ernest Barry, do you have a question for Santa?
Santa Claus Well, NotJack, you can ask me about any event you want. I would tell you there have been many I’ve witnessed. Natural disasters like Mt. St. Helens. Or political history like the fall of the Berlin Wall. Or weather history like Hurricane Katrina. Or sports history, like the Cubs winning the World Series.
Elf Ernest Santa…what about 19th Century figures like Charles Dickens?
Barry Whats your favorite thing about christmas? I like waking up with my family with the fire on.
NotJack Fall of the Berlin Wall!? What was it like?!
Santa Claus Charles Dickens. Good boy. Big believer. Loved Christmas pranks.
Sector 5 lead Elf Crusader or tom brady getting 7 super bowl rings?
Santa Claus The Berlin Wall was a fantastic event. It happened years too late, but thank goodness it happened. It was a stunning moment. For years, you know, I could not get into that part of Berlin.
Santa Claus Right, I’ve seen Tom Brady get all his rings.
Santa Claus Was it really 7? My gosh.
NotJack Agreed! It’s really fascinating though!
Weathertrackingelf I do have one more question for Santa
Elf Ernest Elf Buttercup – have you a question for Santa?
Elf Ernest Ok, Weathertrackingelf, go ahead
Elf Ernest PeppermintSnow, do you have a question for Santa?
Weathertrackingelf Do you like hot cocoa with your cookies?
Sector 5 lead Elf Crusader yes sir. Six with the patriots. One with the buccaneers
Santa Claus Yes, I do. You’ll never guess what my favorite cocoa is right now
Weathertrackingelf What is your favorite coco Santa?
Santa Claus I’ve got my hands on a new cocoa called Roasted Hazelnut. Never had it before the other day. I’m obsessed with it.
Elf Ernest Wow, Santa. That’s specific!
Sector 5 lead Elf Crusader i also have 1 more question for you Santa
Weathertrackingelf It sounds really good Sir
Elf Ernest Do you expect everyone to leave out Roasted Hazelnut for you on Christmas Eve?
Santa Claus Oh goodness no. On Christmas Eve I prefer COLD drinks. I get thirsty
Elf Ernest Oh that’s interesting!
PeppermintSnow No, I don’t think I have any questions. Any I did have were already answered which is nice
Barry I have a question.
Elf Ernest What do you prefer cold to drink, Santa?
Elf Ulan I like hazelnut too!
Weathertrackingelf I will leave you out a few bottles of water for you Sir
Elf Taylor Hi, just wondering, is there a specific order in which we are supposed to ask questions or can we just asks whenever we want?
Elf Ernest Go ahead Barry
Sector 5 lead Elf Crusader you should try Spanish. Hot chocolate
Elf Florentina C On Christmas Eve, do you ever wish someone would leave your a nice glass of water instead of milk?
Elf Ernest Elf Taylor, go ahead
Sector 5 lead Elf Crusader like a coke?
Barry Santa, have you ever gotten into a serious accident where Christmas could have been ruined? How did you solve it?
Santa Claus Yes, Elf Florentina C – I love water. Milk is great with the cookies but nothing hits the spot like water. Thank you for thinking of that.
Elf Ulan I have one more question for Santa
Sector 5 lead Elf Crusader i have one more question
Elf Taylor Hi, just wondering, is there a specific Christmas movie that’s a realistic representaion of the North Pole and/or Santa?
Santa Claus Barry, that’s an excellent question. And thankfully, no. I’ve had little scrapes here and there. Knocked down a fence or two in my time. But never anything major. I have a lot of elves looking out for me.
Santa Claus Elf Taylor – thank you, outstanding question. In a word NO – there is no realistic movie yet made about the North Pole or, frankly, me. And I don’t want one, by the way.
Barry I’m glad there wasn’t anything serious! It’s always good to have a buddy around for things like that.
Santa Claus Elf Crusader, yes, sometimes I enjoy a Coke or, better yet, a Pepsi if it is fixed correctly. But water is it most of the time – with the correct amount of ice, if it is available.
Elf Taylor Ok, thanks! Is there a movie that is your favorite?
Elf Ernest Ok, folks. time to wrap it up. Last minute questions for Santa?
Jill Can I ask mine?
elf buttercup Hi Santa, have the sleigh mishaps, got you worried at all?   Please get a lot of rest looks like a very busy season.
Elf Ernest Yes, Jill
Elf Florentina C Is there anything we can do besides sending reports to help you?
Jill Santa, why can’t you visit a house if the parents don’t believe?
Santa Claus Elf Buttercup – the sleigh will be fine. I’m not concerned. We’ve got better than three weeks to resolve the issues.
elf buttercup That great news
Santa Claus Elf Taylor, I enjoy many Christmas movies but I’ll always be partial to good interpretations of A Christmas Carol. Lots of lessons in that story.
Elf Ulan How many jingle bells have on your sleigh? And where are they put? Santa!
Sector 5 lead Elf Crusader Santa, i was wondering;: know you don’t gift girlfriends , but is there any way you can send a letter to this gal I like?
Santa Claus I don’t know the count, right now, Elf Ulan on the bells. It’s in the thousands. But I’d have to ask the Sleigh Bell Department that question. It’s not a matter of how many, but how in tune those bells are. They are crucial for the reindeer to maintain their rhythm
Santa Claus Elf Crusader, on matters of the heart I would defer to Mrs. Claus. Have you sought out her advice?
Elf Ernest Go ahead Jill
Elf Ulan Thank you, I heard you use the bells to communicate with your reindeer. I wonder how
Sector 5 lead Elf Crusader no sir. I did not think of that
Jill Santa, why can’t you visit a house if the parents don’t believe?
Santa Claus Jill, I think we’ve answered your question before. Simply put, the “master of the house” is the master, and I respect it. It is always tough in homes where you have believers and non-believers under the same roof. But I will not go where I do not have permission.
Elf Ernest Thank you everyone for being here.
Elf Ernest And thank you Santa for your time and patience tonight with so many here. You do a fantastic job!
4 replies
  1. Elf Ulan
    Elf Ulan says:

    Thank you Elf Ernest and Santa! It’s an exciting and fantastic time with all of you! I learned a lot this time too. I want to be a real elf for Santa as Santa told us! And I’ll leave cold water (with ice) for Santa and his reindeer on Christmas Eve! Please stay safe and healthy, and Merry Christmas! I hope to see you someday soon ^^

  2. Shyanne Robertson
    Shyanne Robertson says:

    Hi Santa Claus maybe can you please go to my house first on Christmas Eve at 9:00 PM please and thank you Santa Claus

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